Last month, I took a quick 36-hour work trip to New York. I had a packed schedule and didn't make any plans to see friends because I didn't know how my days would go and how tired I would be after my day-long meetings. So, one night I needed to eat and went to a nice restaurant for dinner…by myself. I used to dread eating by myself in public and would opt to just stay home instead. I worried people would think I was on a blind date that never showed. Or that I wouldn't know what to do with myself with no one to talk to. But after 39 years on this planet, I just didn't care anymore. I had a lovely dinner out by myself. I people watched…I thought about life. It gave me a chance to really savor the food and know that I didn't have to stay in my hotel room just because I didn't have any social plans with others. And it felt great.
Do you guys go out to dinner by yourself? Would you?
Oh, and PS. Have a great long weekend! We'll see you back here on Tuesday!
{Photo by Lily Glass}
I’m an old maid and I go out to eat alone a lot.
Such a lovely post Joy! I admire your bravery in eating out alone, and it’s an interesting topic to discuss. I find it really inspiring when I hear about people who can do it, and it makes me think maybe I can too! Thanks for sharing. 🙂 xx
Helen | Helen’s Fashion, Beauty & Lifestyle Blog
haha i love it!
joy
Eating out alone used to be a hard no for me – there was so much anxiety built up around it. And then on my 26th birthday I decided to embrace the fear of all the ‘what ifs’ and I took myself out to breakfast. It was uncomfortable for a bit, but soon enough it felt more empowering than scary.
I now dine out alone regularly and love having the confidence to fly solo.
Hi Hannah,
Love that!
Joy
Yes, I love eating alone! Initially I was hesitant but once I tried it I loved it. I used to be a waitress and people would often dine alone and bring a book and take their time. It helps me focus on savoring the food without feeling pressured to maintain a conversation or take care of my son (if he’s with me). Now that it’s rare for me to get alone time as a mom, I treasure this time of quiet and me time more! Also, I’ve started watching movies solo since I got MoviePass as my alone time break. People always ask me who I go with, and I say no one! It’s nice to just focus on the movie and be lost in my thoughts.
Ohhhh right now, eating alone seems like a treat!! Ha ha. As a mom of 2 little ones, I sometimes dream of having a quiet meal out somewhere by myself. But the reality of it would probably be quite different! I remember it used to feel a bit strange. But you’re right. In the end, all that matters isn’t what other people think – it’s enjoying your meal and the experience itself.
I am single and live in a town without any friends. I realized along time ago, that I need to get over that fear of eating out alone because I wouldn’t experience new things / restaurant.
I would totally go to dinner by myself!
BK (before kids) I have gone to the movies an actually on vacation by myself you might think is sad, but I really enjoyed and now with two boys I really miss time by myself
I love doing things by myself! I have friends, I’m married and my mom and sister live close but I still do things on my own. Not all the time, but every once in a while it’s really nice. Movies, concerts even, a meal. Don’t laugh…but I have been on 2 New Kids On The Block cruises by myself and had the best time ever! Yup I still love me some NKOTB ?
Hi Joy
Like you, I’m a natural introvert. In the past (for most of my life) I was dreadfully self-conscious. I’m 39 this year too, and travel a lot for work, and it isn’t usually possible to arrange for dining companions. But the smartphone has definitely made it a LOT easier to eat out alone! You can read whatever you like, eat whatever you like, and talk to whomever you feel like. It’s a kind of freedom that I (and no one else) denied myself for so many years. Over a late solo dinner in London recently, I had an absolutely delicious dinner at a cool restaurant, chatted (when I felt like it) with a mum and daughter on holiday next to me, and left feeling like I’d done myself a favour.
I like to go to the movies by myself! I don’t have to share my popcorn! I’ve gone to restaurants alone too. I never worried what other people thought, except when I’m staring at them subconsciously lol.
Ha! yes, I feel like I have so much time when I eat by myself. No one else to feed!
Joy
OMG that is amazing!!!!
Joy
Aw I love that!! Thanks for sharing!
Joy
haha so true!
joy
Kentucky Jess, is that you?
I started eating at restaurants by myself ‘by accident’. When I was a teen with a part time job, I really wanted some real food one lunch break (not a grab and go sandwich!). My boss thought it was really crazy and brave that I did that… I didn’t see the fuss… I was just SO hungry it surpassed any feeling awkward.
Since then it’s something I enjoy and look forward to, as a treat to myself now and then 😀
I rarely eat alone in public, but when I do, I only feel anxious when I have nothing with me to keep me “busy” like a book to read or laptop with me to do work on. I’m going to be traveling/vacationing solo this summer for a few weeks in Europe and it’s my first time doing an international solo trip and ironically enough, eating my meals alone is what I’m most anxious about! I love getting to chat with a friend over a me; it’s one of my most favorite things to do. Looks like I’ll need to bring a couple of good books along with me! Or it’ll be a good time to just face my fears and anxiety head on. Your blog post definitely helped. 🙂 Thanks, Joy!
It’s definitely a weird feeling at first, but the trip will be so good for you!
Joy
Ah, love how it happened by accident but was also so good for you to experience early on!
Joy
Wow, I must say I am surprised to learn that you have never done this solo. I just presumed in your line of work you would have done this plenty. 🙂 I mostly get my creative ideas when I am alone. I am in my late twenties, and I have eaten solo, traveled solo, and done a lot of stuff solo, just because I want to. Mostly because I dont enjoy people’s company ALL the time and love having moments to myself to be able to do the things I want at my own pace, and in my own peace. My husband and my friends think I am a little bit peculiar for doing so. I normally tend to get anxious when I am around people than when I am solo. It helps me re-energize myself and then take on my social life again. 🙂
I love alone time for sure but dinners out is probably the one I get to do the least!
Joy