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happy friday + time for yourself…



For the last year or so, I've been really bad at making time for myself. I have barely exercised (I used to work out five times a week!), I've hardly watched TV (I used to veg our for hours after work every night), and I can't remember the last time I got a massage (my favorite treat!)! Part of me has been really cranky, and I didn't realize why until recently. I spend all of this time taking care of my family, my business, my house…but I forgot to take care of myself. Have you guys found yourself doing this too? It's easy to say you're too busy or don't have time, but I am tired of that excuse. Because the bottom line is…you make time for things that are important. And giving yourself a little treat or some downtime every so often is important.

So as we head into the weekend…let's all make a little time for ourselves, shall we? Do something simple, satisfying, magical, relaxing, or indulgent. Just for you.

P.S. Thanks so much for all your kind words from my first Goal-Getter post this week. I was really touched by all your comments and emails. Part 2 coming next week!

{Photo by Bonnie Tsang}


  1. Much needed relaxation indeed. Jay and I are moving into our new place on Monday so next week will be crazy. We’ll definitely need to do something fun this weekend before the madness begins. Have a good weekend, Joy!

  2. Take care of yourself before you take care of others!! If you are happy and healthy you will be able to make others happy. I hope you get some time to relax this weekend.

  3. I have the same problem of time… not easy every day… But still bravo for your brilliant route and your courage! Have a lovely weekend, Virginie (a French girl)

  4. Having ME time and taking care of yourself is so important! You learn so much about yourself you never realized and you have fun doing it. I never explored different activities or options available to me and now that I have, I love it. It’s really a great feeling and I hope you’ll get to experience it too.

  5. i’m with ya. i totally feel like i can’t ever leave my son. it’s been over nine months and we still haven’t had a night away. tomorrow i’m taking a couple hours for myself to get a (much needed) haircut! first in like six months!

  6. These are such wise words. I too am tired of the “too busy” excuse. How we spend our time is a choice and this was a welcome reminder that sometimes we need to make the decision to step outside the frenetic pace of life and make some room to relax. Hope your weekend is filled with lots of that.

  7. Nice timing for this post- earlier this week I was feeling overwhelmed by life so I blocked off all of tomorrow to spend in the studio lost in my ‘fun’ projects 🙂

  8. I can totally relate, also! It feels selfish to take time for ourselves when we become mothers. I have struggled SO MUCH to find balance, but I have been learning lately that it really helps me to let go of control and let my husband help me around the house even though he doesn’t do things exactly the way I would do them.

  9. That was a much needed reminder, Joy! My fall semester, I took great care of myself. I was working out, cooking great meals, relaxing on weekends, and then I got “busy” and spring semester I got crabby. Now that it’s summer, I’m definitely going to treat and take care of myself better!

  10. OH LADY! I hear ya! Since having my baby in October, I have spent very little time for myself. I am the same as you- used to work out, watch my shows, get pampered. But today, for the first time in a very long time, I’m getting my hair done. Cant tell ya how stoked!
    The thing is… I work full time, leaving baby with a sitter 40+ hours a week. I feel horribly guilty not spending quality time with her when I’m not at work. I totally know a mama needs some mental health time, but its so hard, ya know? Such a conundrum!
    Anyways, thanks for the reminder to break away!

  11. i completely agree! i am a mother of three and just bought myself a bike. i have been wanting one for way too long. it sounds so silly but because we live in nyc, it wasn’t on the top of my list of things to buy. i can’t tell you how excited i am to start riding it on a regular basis! i love how something so simple can help.
    i’m reading the book “daring greatly”, and one her points is…cultivating play and rest.
    this can be easily forgotten or hard to do for some!!
    thank you for the reminder!!

  12. I totally relate to this as work has been crazy lately. Luckily I have a few brunch dates scheduled this weekend with girlfriends I haven’t seen in WAY too long. Mimosas are definitely in order!
    P.S. Just got your book yesterday and am loving it!

  13. I’ve got the same crankiness going on with all the end of the school year business. Just you wait! 🙂 I’m thinking of slipping out by myself to see Frances Ha. Been so long since I’ve gone to our local indie theater. Two hours of quiet!

  14. Thanks for this post Joy! I am so tired today I feel like crying. Dreaming about daycare and a massage.

  15. One of the best tips I ever read somewhere was that wherever you say “I am too busy for that” or “I don’t have time for that” you should replace it with “that is not a priority for me” and see how it sounds. It’s easy to say “I’m too busy to exercise” but it makes you take a step back when you say “exercise is not a priority for me.” LIke you said, if it is a priority, you’ll find the time.

  16. Self care is the number one thing as a person but especially a mama, because you regulate the whole system. I also think it’s the biggest gift you can give to a girl, don’t be a martyr, Mom’s needs matter, etc, etc, it’s so healthy and yet it’s not what we are taught. Great thing to model for a little boy too, women shouldn’t be expected to be selfless every moment. I have struggled with this since having my first child, and I am grateful to you for sharing the importance of taking time for yourself! That time will pay back dividends for your family life.

  17. I totally agree with you, and I can’t wait to read your post next week about what you did for yourself. I realized that lately too after being sooooo busy with life too. And as Amy just said, as a mama you regulate the whole system so you HAVE TO feel good and to be at your best to support the entire system.
    I recently just took a day for myself, you can read it in my blog ( It felt so good, and it feels like I regained enough energy for the next ten years.
    I alos take time to say THANK YOU JOY because I discovered the blogosphere with your blog some months ago (yeah I know … on what planet have I been! 🙂 And it is from your blog that I found lovetaza, designlovefest, and all those lovely girls I keep reading about everyday. You girls inspired me, and I started my own blog! 😉
    Oh, and also a little metaphoric idea about the importance of taking time for yourself. As a pilot, and frequent traveller, I often think about that. When the oxygen masks fall down in the plane because of a pressure problem, you have to put it on your head first, even if it means watching your kids faint. Because when you’re ok, you can help your kids … whereas if you put it on your kids head first, you faint, and they don’t know how to hold it, and … it can get really bad … our life as busy mamas is like that everyday!!!!
    Have a nice day joy, and enjoy your massage! 🙂

  18. That is such an adorable basket!
    Taking time out for yourself is definitely really important! And sometimes appreciating yourself is something everyone forgets about.

  19. I’m terribly at planning too much and giving myself little down time, but mostly I’m pretty good at relaxing…I think.
    But I’m sending this to my mum, she doesn’t give herself enough time to do nothing or just enjoy whatever she feels like doing, like practising the piano which I know is something she wants to do.
    You’ve worded the need for making time for yourself so well, Joy. thanks!

  20. Have you heard of the book The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People? One of the habits if “sharpening the saw,” which means making time to renew yourself. It’s so easy to try to DO things to get ahead but we also need to just be, slow down, stop, and relax. I hope you are enjoying your weekend! I need to schedule a massage soon too!

  21. The funny thing everybody forgets, is that it is all about priorities. You simply make time for what is importent to you, but that can be very hard! Atleast for me.. But as you are saying, it is importent to have time for yourself 🙂 Good writing lovely read.

  22. I agree Joy! My “me time” today consisted of a pot of ‘French Earl Grey’ tea (from T2 a gorgeous Australian tea company whilst reading your book Blog, Inc! I’m currently sitting in front of the fire, thinking about what to cook for dinner, however, the thought of having toast for dinner so I can continue to read is quite tempting!!
    Bless you!
    Love Nat xx

  23. yes, this is so important! since becoming a mom i am terrible at making time for myself. i spend all of my “me time” on my business or catching up on the house or errands. one of my new year’s resolutions was to change that, i know i am a better person when i have that time for myself!

  24. I was better at taking care of myself before kids too….not great, but at least better than I am now. Having kids will do that to you – you try to make the most out of the little time you get, but in the end, there so much less of that time when your family grows. My husband has been helping me enforce “me time” and that’s been so helpful. He’ll randomly tell me “This afternoon, I am taking the girls, go do something for yourself.” Love him for that.

  25. Yeah I think Ill keep him around 😉
    – This Little Street-
    On Jun 11, 2013, at 10:40 PM, Oh Joy wrote:
    That is so wonderful of him! A keeper for sure! 😉

  26. It’s funny I’m reading this now cuz last weekend I was so cranky (direct result of not having enough ‘me’ time) I had a fight with the hubby and decided he was going to watch the boy for the day and I’m going to get myself a medi and a pedi and then go shopping. It was nice! But then I was thinking to myself afterwards why did I have to let it all escalate into a fight to realize that I needed time to myself?!


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